+25 BONUS
Is staying here, continuing this toxic dance with Arthur, really what’s best for Miles? Or am I just afraid of hurting him in the short term, even if leaving would be better for him in the long run?
Biting my lip, I pull out my phone and send a text to Alice: Can you come with me to look at an apartment tomorrow? Got the Abbott residency.”
Her response is immediate: “OMG CONGRATS!!! Yes, of course. What time?”
I set a time to meet, then lie back on the bed, my decision made. It will hurt–Goddess, it will hurt Miles to leave this place he’s just begun to think of as home, to uproot him yet again. But the lawyer is right. Children shouldn’t be exposed to this.
For Miles‘ sake, we need to go. We’ll rebuild, just as we did before. We’ll have peace again, even if it’s painful at
first.
The following morning, I meet up with Alice at the Abbott Gallery. The leasing agent takes us through the apartment, and I have to admit, it’s stunning.
High ceilings with exposed beams. Tall windows that flood the space with natural light. A spacious main room that could serve as both a living area and studio. A small but modern kitchen. A separate bedroom with enough space for both Miles and me, at least for now.
The leasing agent smiles proudly as she shows us around. “The stipend is modest, but it covers utilities and basic expenses with a little extra for miscellaneous expenditures. You’d be expected to work on–site at least thirty hours a week, but the schedule is flexible.”
“And my son?” I ask. “Would he be allowed to stay here with me?”
“Of course. We’ve had resident artists with children before. There’s a playground two blocks away, and a good elementary school within walking distance.”
I wander to one of the windows, looking down at the busy street below. It’s in a completely different part of the city from Arthur’s apartment–far enough that we wouldn’t run into him accidentally, but close enough that Miles could still see his father regularly. If it comes to that.
“What do you think?” Alice asks, joining me at the window.
“I think…” I take a deep breath. “I think it’s perfect.” I turn to the agent. “Can I sign the lease today?”
She beams. “Absolutely.”
An hour later, the paperwork is completed. I’m officially the newest artist–in–residence at Abbott Gallery, with a move–in date three days from now.
Now, I just need to tell Miles.
“But I don’t want to go!” Miles shouts. “This is our home! With Daddy!”
I kneel in front of him, keeping my voice calm despite the way my heart is breaking. “I know it feels that way, sweetie. But this is going to be good for us. You’ll understand when you’re older.”
“No!” He stomps his foot, tears streaming down his face.” want to stay here!”
I reach for him, but he jerks away from my touch. “Miles, please try to understand-
1/2
Chapter 123
“You’re just mad at Daddy!” he accuses. “You’re being mean!”
+25 BONUS
The words hit me like a slap to the face. I swallow hard. “This isn’t about being mad at Daddy. This is about what’s best for both of us.”
“You’re lying!” He backs away from me. “You promised we would stay! You promised!”
I didn’t, actually. But in his mind, I had. In his mind, we were finally a family, the three of us together, a happily ever after. And now I’m shattering that dream.
“Miles-”
But he turns and runs, slamming his bedroom door behind him. I rise slowly to my feet, feeling like the worst mother in the world. Is this really the right decision? Am I just being selfish, putting my career before my son’s happiness?
For the rest of the evening, Miles refuses to speak to me. He won’t come out for dinner. He won’t look at me when I bring a plate to his room. He won’t even answer when I tell him I love him. He’s gone completely nonverbal.
The silent treatment continues until bedtime, when I tuck him in despite his stony silence. I kiss his forehead, whispering, “I love you so much, little wolf.” For the first time, the nickname feels different on my tongue–now that I know the truth.
He turns his face away and doesn’t answer.
I’m doing the right thing, I remind myself for the thousandth time all day. For both of us. Even if it doesn’t feel that way right now.
Once I’m sure Miles is asleep, I retrieve a suitcase from the closet and begin quietly packing.
